Abcd12348 Member Profile

...See more First post as I'm a bit nervous to open up about how I'm feeling. I haven't officially been diagnosed with bpd but I have been told by a therapist years ago that I have signs of it or bipolar. I have been working on getting a referral to a phyciastrist. But these are some things i struggle with, does anyone relate to these issues? Are they a part of bpd? •almost always been empty, lonely, lost •being around other people I feel like I'm looking from the outside in, like I'm not really there in the moment •having anxiety talking to people as if my speech is delayed from what my brain is saying. Almost like I'm talking and not even realize what I've said until I've said it. Stuttering and repeating myself when anxiety is bad •depressed days where I don't even want to wakeup, have no energy *self doubt majority of the time but rare spouts of over confidence * excessively worrying what everyone thinks of me *constantly overthinking and making a big deal over nothing *worrying in relationships if they really love and care about me even tho they tell and show me they do. Taking every little thing they do and seeing the bad in it thinking they are trying to hurt me. Worrying they don't want to be around me or with me *debilitating anxiety about going anywhere in public. Especially driving *outbursts of anger and screaming and sometimes so upset I say I don't want to be alive anymore(or worse) and acting extremely intense. Then shortly after I come to and realize what I did and I'm so embarrassed *irribilty, things set me off easily *panic attacks There is probably more but these are some things that makes me feel not "normal"

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