Bluejay13 Member Profile

...See more Hi there! I'm new here so hopefully I'm doing this right. I've really been struggling lately trying to determine whether I actually have some type of eating disorder or if I'm just overreacting about it all. I feel extremely guilty after eating (especially "unhealthy" foods). I bring very small amounts of food to school so I dont eat too much, but then am so hungry when I get home that I end up eating whatever I can find. This makes me feel absolutely terrible about myself. In the evening I always watch youtube and usually grab a snack to eat. I never worry when I get it or when I'm eating it, but afterwards I just feel this overwhelming guilt and hate myself for eating "bad" food. It's starting to impact my life as I dread family get togethers or parties as I know I'll eat and then later feel horrible about it. Sometimes I feel fine about myself and eating, but then sometimes I hate my body and am so angry at myself for choosing to eat a snack or take a second bowl at dinner. I desperately want to talk about it with my mom, but I feel like she will feel that shes "failed" as my mother since I have such low self esteem and an unhealthy relationship with food. First of all, do I have an eating disorder? My "symptoms" dont seem to really match any disorder, so I feel like I'm just overreacting and need to get over it. If I do have a serious issue, how can I discuss it with my mom without causing her to feel guilty or upset? Thanks😊

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