BrightBunny32 Member Profile

...See more My 9 months of sobriety from alcohol is coming up next week and I'm struggling very badly to get there. I was able to do it without going into a recovery program and with very little to no support from family and friends. To make things worse I had just started seeing a therapist who diagnosed me with PTSD. I'm just very overwhelmed and there's no where to run! I feel stuck in this damaged body broken beyond repair. I frequently fantasize about drinking again because it was my medicine, my best friend, always there when I needed it. But also my worst enemy. I drank anywhere from 9- 17 beers 3 nights a week and spent the rest of the time nursing the hangovers. No i wasn't an "alcoholic" suprisingly but I was definitely a problem drinker. If I drink again I will go back to the same patterns because I have so many times. Perhaps I'm just being impatient wanting everything in my life that I destroyed with the help of alcohol to hurry up and get "better". For everything to return to "normal". But the rational part of me already knows this is my new normal that I must build off of. It's very uncomfortable and frustrating sitting with the anger, sadness, and loneliness. But these are the cards I was dealt. This is the disease I must accept. And I can't blame anyone for it... even myself because if it were up to me at the beginning I would have chosen a better life that never included this legal poison. This is my story and I accept that.

Bio

Recent forum posts

Considering Therapy?

About Us

Get Started

Online Therapy

Terms

Bio

Recent forum posts

Considering Therapy?

About Us

Get Started

Online Therapy

Terms

Personal Conversation Requests

General Conversation Requests

New Messages