ConnMomma12 Member Profile

...See more Give you some information first My husband and I are both 32. We got together when we were 22. I had just given birth to my youngest daughter who I didn't conceive consensually... He took on the role of being her dad and is her dad. Before I go on to tell what's going on, I want to answer a question that I feel like will pop up. "Why are you still with him?". The answer is I have no one. No family (parents expressed never wanting me, sisters told me I was an embarrassment), no friends (I stay so depressed that it's hard to keep a friendship. If I'm not stuck up their ***, it usually ends) nothing. I don't have a support system and I never have. Sooo. For 10 years, I can't name a single point in our relationship, other than MAYBE the past year that my husband hasn't cheated. I've never been able to describe the hurt and pain it's caused and because so, I guess it's never really been taken serious.... 10 years and every birthday, mother's day, valentines day, Christmas has been "forgotten". My birthday is 1 month after my husband's. And I'm not even materialistic. I have a *** ton of arts and crafts and would have loved anything. It's the thought. The moment in time where you're all that persons thought about. I genuinely don't get that from anyone... I have had people, his parents, my family call me out of my name, belittle me, and he does nothing. Pulls out his phone I guess to try and mask his embarrassment. I havey body constantly ridiculed. I've had health issues due to losing a lot of weight in a short period of time. He never once stopped his parents from spreading rumors that I was on drugs even though I was seeing a gastroenterologist... He's not physically or verbally abusive. I've just never really felt loved, cared for, protected. I have 2 jobs while he door dashes occasionally so I'm the provider. But I can't be home in the mornings to put my girls on the school bus and he is. So I'm in a spot where I can't leave this marriage but I feel like I'm slowly losing my mind. My temper is so short. I stay in such bad moods. Therapy seems like it's a waste. I don't know why I wrote this or what I expected to get from it.... I don't know. I just don't know what to do...

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