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Ehlisa
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PathStep 32 Compassion hearts12 Forum posts9 Forum upvotes22 Current upvotes22 Age GroupAdult Last activeNovember, 2015 Member sinceAugust 14, 2015
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I reported it.
Trauma Support / by Ehlisa
Last post
 August 31st, 2018
...See more Hello everyone! I am a 20 year old French girl currently living in London, here's my story: Last year, I've met a man when I was on my first trip to London by my own. As I had a problem with my accommodation, I had to use couchsurfing. That's how I met him. I was 19, he pretended to be 36. I had met him before just for coffee and a photoshoot as he was a photographer. He seemed really friendly, fatherly and professional, so the age difference wasn't a problem. He was living with flatmates etc, so I trusted him quickly. The night I had to stay at his place, I had partied before with friends, so I came back being really drunk. I remembered him and me having few more beers in his empty living room, I also remember him pouring something into my beer and encouraging me to drink it. Which I did when he became really insistent. To make it short, he took me to his bedroom to have sex with him. 'Come on, don't be shy' 'Just to cuddle' he said. Several times, I said no, pushed him, until the moment I was so tired and dizzy I gave up. In the morning he acted really friendly again, everything was fine. So for a long time I thought I wanted it, I didn't really realised what happened. But I was thinking about it all the time, it got obsessing and this, was not normal. Approximatively a year later, I moved to London. My boyfriend convinced me to talk about it to The Havens (which is an organisation that gives medical and psychological support to sexual assaults victims). For the first time, a professional put a word on what happened, and this word was 'RAPE' They said I should report it to the police, but I thought he deserved a second chance. Everybody deserves a second chance right ? As I wanted to understand why he did this, I even tried to contact him. When I was still living in France I sent him a long message on Facebook to tell him I felt raped, but I was ready to talk about it and that I forgave him. His Facebook page got deleted few weeks after. When I moved to London, I even came to his house to knock at his door. Only once. Nobody opened the door. I had lost his number as well and it just seemed as he disappeared. No sign of a professional website on internet.. Nothing. Until one day. Instead of typing his name onto Google I decided to type 'photographer' followed by the name of the place he used to live. And BINGO. An article of the Dailymail showed up. The name and the age of this man were different, but the description convinced me to open the link. No need to read the whole thing, an unflattering picture of him was the first thing that caught my attention. This article was about him. About his trial, only few weeks after he met me (he knew he as going to court when he met me), and about his 7 year sentence for sexual assaults on models. The article also mentioned the fact he was actually 42, and that he had previously served a six-year sentence for raping a 85 year-old woman, when he was just aged 22. Realizing that such a disgusting man put his hands on me and abused me makes me feel incredibly dirty. The obsession about him obviously got worse since I know the truth, and I find myself thinking about him too many times during the day.
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