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FaeryGoddessOfSpring
315 M Embraced 2
PathStep 5 Compassion hearts19 Forum posts6 Forum upvotes10 Current upvotes10 Age GroupAdult Last activeAugust, 2021 Member sinceJuly 21, 2021
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Help me speak...
Anxiety Support / by FaeryGoddessOfSpring
Last post
 August 10th, 2021
...See more When I say I'm scared, it's better expressed as terrified. It leaves panic in my chest and lingers with a physical pain. My thoughts move too fast for my mind to grasp them into words, thoughts like the fears of causing someone I care about pain. It sends me into a shiver, an ice cold dip into the sea of anxiety and depression. I get caught up in my own head and lose myself in memories of times I could speak before I get overwhelmed by these walls I've unwillingly put up. The walls I have are both ways, like a mirror you can barely see through. Only I don't see me, I see you trying to see me I am too afraid to call out saying "I'm right here" but my tears choke me to silence and once again I'm drowning.
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Fear to fight
Anxiety Support / by FaeryGoddessOfSpring
Last post
 August 10th, 2021
...See more All of these tall, plain empty shelves. Always wondering in my head, making it hell. All of this pain i want to get off my back. All of there thoughts, never giving me slack. Please tell me the words that are to be said. To explain all of the problems within my head. Show me how to react to every trigger. With out telling me I'm fine, making my panic bigger. I can only do my best, tall I stand. Trying not to be frightened, by every man. The shape of their jaw, the way they stand. Every solemn promise, suffocation by hand. Mirror a smile, pretend im alright. Silence my subconscious, do not fight.
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Fear to fight
Trauma Support / by FaeryGoddessOfSpring
Last post
 August 12th, 2021
...See more All of these tall, plain empty shelves. Always wondering in my head, making it hell. All of this pain i want to get off my back. All of there thoughts, never giving me slack. Please tell me the words that are to be said. To explain all of the problems within my head. Show me how to react to every trigger. With out telling me I'm fine, making my panic bigger. I can only do my best, tall I stand. Trying not to be frightened, by every man. The shape of their jaw, the way they stand. Every solemn promise, suffocation by hand. Mirror a smile, pretend im alright. Silence my subconscious, do not fight...
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Im lost
Relationship Stress / by FaeryGoddessOfSpring
Last post
 July 22nd, 2021
...See more I had a nightmare.. about him... and i need to not feel the way I do... I hate it. Just when I think I can turn my back on the wasted past 6 years of my life. I hate the feeling in my chest.. the pain... the nausea, the anxiety. I don't want to feel like I miss the feeling of someone holding me... I hate the only remnant I have of that feeling is with him... It hurts me. I hurt ,all over In my head in my heart in my soul. I feel like I'm constantly drowning... consumed by an ocean of black ink... everything so dark. My skin stained, my lungs filled with liquid darkness. My heart slowly dying...My mind confused and my consciousness lost.... I'm sorry to bother you.... goodnight.
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Anxiety... ptsd? Idk trigger warning i think
Trauma Support / by FaeryGoddessOfSpring
Last post
 July 23rd, 2021
...See more someone... even though I know you won't answer I had a nightmare.. about him... and i need to not feel the way I do... I hate it Just when I think I can turn my back on the wasted past 6 years of my life I hate the feeling in my chest.. the pain... the nausea, the anxiety I don't want to feel like I miss the feeling of someone holding me... I hate the only remnant I have of that feeling is with him... It hurts me. I hurt ,all over In my head in my heart in my soul. I feel like I'm constantly drowning... consumed by an ocean of black ink... everything so dark. My skin stained, my lungs filled with liquid darkness My heart slowly dying... My mind confused and my consciousness lost.... I feel like if I reach out to you... you'll fall in... you be stained too Im ruined... I'm dirty and used.... you You're clean, new, stainless and glowing... I don't want to have you fall... I don't want to taint your light... For now I'll keep this to my self... continue to bottle up everything I don't want you to see...continue to be happy so you can too.... I want to be next to you without your light going out... even if it means me wearing a mask .. I'm sorry to bother you.... goodnight...
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