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FruitsCoconut
1 1,338 M Little Steps 4
PathStep 18 Compassion hearts32 Forum posts2 Forum upvotes1 Current upvotes1 Age GroupAdult Last activeMarch, 2026 Member sinceNovember 26, 2023
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I can’t take this anymore
Bipolar, Schizophrenia & Psychosis Support / by FruitsCoconut
Last post
 January 12th, 2024
...See more My medication isn’t working. I’m still seeing things that I don’t want to see. I don’t know how to describe them. It feels so real, but it isn’t real. I’m hallucinating and panicking. I just want to be alone in my bedroom, but I keep seeing them. I don’t want to see them. I want to be alone. I’m not able to see my psychiatrist. I can’t see her for a long time until the appointment. My parents don’t care. They don’t. The medication needs a higher dose. The doors don’t have locks. The doors can be opened. I act normal in school, but when I’m alone in the house or my bedroom, I start talking to myself. They’re not real. Make it stop. Stop it. Stop. I’m on the verge. I can’t be sent back, or things won’t go well. I just wanted to get away from my parents and from people. That’s why I sent myself to the behavioral clinic. I felt as if it were a vacation. This bedroom should have locks. I don’t want my brother to come in. It’s all cozy here, but I’m packing. I feel overstimulated by these things. They won’t stop. The medication needs more doses. I act normal in school. I don’t think I should listen to the voices. Sometimes, or all the time. I don’t know. I’m stupid. I act, talk, or type as if I’m a maniac here. I can’t socialize. Nobody wants to be my friend. I’m terrible at socializing. I wish I could, but no. Should I go to the behavioral clinic again? Maybe I should. My throat is choking. I just want to go to sleep, but I keep seeing them. Nothing will be normal. Why can’t things go normally? No? No? My dad wants to abuse me. I don’t know. Why. Why. I can’t think for myself. Just stop it all. Stop it.
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I hate my art class…
Anxiety Support / by FruitsCoconut
Last post
 December 1st, 2023
...See more I hate my studio art class because my studio art teacher is lazy and doesn’t request me in seminar to finish my art when I ask to because I’m behind. Also, he doesn’t motivate or remind any of the students in the studio art class to actually try, improve, or redo their art, which is why everybody in that class has an average bad grade and is ahead of me. I take my time doing the art and they don't, except for the AP studio art students. He’s a terrible teacher, and my fundamentals of art teacher was better because he was stricter and actually cared about people doing good in art. By the way, he let the AP studio art students be mixed with this art class just so it could be more challenging for us. He didn't even ask for a schedule change for the AP studio art students at the beginning of the semester. By the way, there's only two AP studio art students in my class, versus more than 10 studio art students in my class. The AP studio art class is mixed in with the studio art class in google classroom, and I can't tell what assignment is studio art because of the bunch of AP studio art assignments there. There are barely due dates for the assignments in the google classroom class, and I have five assignments I haven't completed because of so much confusion. He made it hard when I wanted it to be easy. I was taken to a behavior clinic because of the stress and anxiety of moving to new places and trying to build a better me. He just wants the money for his retirement, which he actually said to the whole class. Ugh, I can't take this anymore. I feel like giving up. I hate art and I'll quit taking his class at the end of this semester.
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