Gsnellbaker94 Member Profile

...See more I'm 30 yra old, I have a 6 yr old and had a fiancée of 5 years who was a great step-dad. Over the last several weeks I've had a lot of anger/rage and was lashing out at everyone. Last Sunday I started to hole myself up in my room not talking to anyone and barely eating. Wednesday night I spoke to my fiance to tell him this was me at my lowest point and I made the mistake of telling him if he couldn't handle this he had to walk away. Thursday he got up and left for work early like normal and he's usually there until 4:30 pm. He shower up around 10 am with friends to grab stuff to leave and said he needed time. I bawled my eyes out and begged him to stay so we can work it out but he left. I reached out to him Friday to see if we could talk but he kept saying things like "Please not yet. I don't have the words together please just take this time for you and rest and heal please." Friday I did make any appointment to see my doctor to get back on my depression meds. And I have been trying to find a therapist or someone to talk to but with it being the weekend that's been really hard. I've reflected on the Bible some which helps for a moment but my anxiety come in huge waves that makes me feel so panicky I feel like I'm losing the battle with my mind. And of course I'm writing all of this at 5 am because I woke up and feel like my chest is in a vice and meditation has been helping.

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