H5188 Member Profile

...See more I have had this friend for over a year now. In that time we have been like sisters, being there for each other when we need it, joking around, even joining a D&D group together & a RP server on Discord. I was there when she was diagnosed with anxiety that developed from emotional abuse she suffered from a guy long before I met her. In turn she was there for me when I was dealing with emotional abuse from a former friend who decided I was not worth keeping around due to political differences. However things have been rocky with her ever since she got into her 1st relationship with a mutual guy friend at the end of September. Ths guy has a habit of flirting aggressively with other girl friends we share, some of which I know he has asked out in the past but was rejected & even once I tried to attract him but he wasn't interested & moved on. The two have known each other as long as I have her & he in the past has helped force her out of her shell a bit, though there was no romantic attraction until that September. But since then her personality seems to have gone a full 180 where now she's focusing all her energy at getting everyone's attention concerning the relationship or herself in general. Both originally asked the relationship be kept private, which I have respected, but others have not. One friend in particular who was pushing for them to be a couple back when they were still platonic & since then she loves to run her mouth about how she was right about them & flaunting the couple off when no other couple in our friend group she does this to, & neither one of the mentioned couple stops her. If anything they seem to be almost encouraging ppl to talk, showing off couple art they commissioned barely a week after the announcement, posting selfies of them together ignoring that they've only met in person twice with a 10+ hour drive between them, & constantly flirting in public Discord servers. One day that really got to me was during New Years when I spent a day writing an essay about the ppl that touched my life in 2018 & how special they are to me. Everyone loved it & I was so happy to make them all happy. But then my female friend decided to make the whole thing about herself & her new bf. I felt very hurt that she would do that, but I kept my mouth shut because I didn't want to start a fight. I have been trying for these long months to try & not get involved with this because it is not my place to get in the middle of the relationship. As much as I want to protect her, I have to let her make her mistakes & grow up, even if she's gonna possibly get hurt in the long run. Plus it just gets uncomfortable after a while when all you want to talk about is your bf, & after 6 months this behavior I feel should've calmed down. So often when it comes up I try to ignore it or divert attention to something else to indicate that talking about & sharing too much of your relationship, especially publicly when asked to keep private, is not a good idea. Well last night the bf decided to send an angry message at me for not acknowledging the relationship & that I am just being resentful because & I quote "I don't like you & like her" which is not the case at all. I explained my side of things to him that I am trying not to get involved & definitely am not attracted to him. His response: "So in order to help her grow up you try to overshadow anything to do with us?" Again I explained that I am trying not to get involved or start a fight. He never responded back. But his sudden outburst is alarming to me because it is very ooc for him to do that & the fact that he seems to be almost threatened by the fact that I don't want to deal with the relationship which again the two supposedly want private. It comes off as insecure that out of all the blind praise the 2 get about how "adorable" they are, one person not giving them the attention is a problem. I have debated telling my friend what her bf did & to open up on how I feel, but idk if that will cause more problems down the line. I have talked with one of the listeners here as well as some separate friends from this group & they all say I should just leave the servers & abandon the friendship altogether because at the rate this relationship is going, they are going to crash & burn hard, which I believe now more than ever after bf's outburst & knowing my friend's anxiety. But considering all we've been through & how much I care about her, I don't want to just up & quit on her either. So I'm at a weird crossroads where I don't know what the right answer is. I want to be happy for her, but this whole situation has been difficult to deal with. If anyone has any advice on how to deal with this other than tossing this friendship out the window, please let me know. Thanks.

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