ItinkweargointoneedmorepotaetohS Member Profile

...See more Yup, I think we all know those words... some other similar ones: "I'm not ready for a relationship" "I don't know who I am" "I am too codependent on you" I struggled with substance abuse for several years before she came into my life... Let's put it this way, if it is considered a drug, I've probably already done it. But when she came into my life it was like light shining through my darkness. As we became closer friends, I eventually promised myself that I would clean myself up so that I could deserve to have someone like her in my life. We finally started dating after being really friends for a few years (I was pretty clean at this point). I let myself be truly vulnerable around her. She got to see me as me, not the me I let everyone else see. After two years on top of that mountain, I feel myself slowly losing my grip on the rocks and it is a long way to the bottom. Without her, I feel myself regressing to old habits and coping techniques. I have never felt so alone and lost. I miss her so much and I just wanna hold her in my arms again. But it hurts just to talk to her, to know that who I want is just out of reach. I can't look at any of our old pictures. These past couple months have just been horrible. I've lost weight, been next to useless at work, and had trouble sleeping. I hurt so much, but I think the thing that really hurt was the fact that I opened up to her in a way I never ever have before with anyone. And she blindsided me while I was at my most vulnerable.

Bio

Recent forum posts

Talk to an expert therapist

I am classically trained as a Dialectical Behavioral Therapy (DBT) and...

About Us

Get Started

Online Therapy

Terms

Bio