Itisscarlie831 Member Profile

...See more So, let me add some context. I am 20 years old. I currently live with my Father and Brother. It used to be my Mother as well but she and my Dad separated years ago. I think since I left school, my Dad has been trying to get me to do things. It doesn’t happen super often, but when it does it sucks he INSISTS that I try new hobbies and things. And it’s not like I can not do it, I have to try. And yeah, I could try things myself but here’s the problem, I don’t. I struggle to decide. but when he does tell me I need to do things, it does upset me. And he knows it, and has said he will step back. But he will still nag me. Tell me about how I should me much busier than I am how busy am I? I do volunteer work twice a week (trying to find a proper job too), I do music practise once a week and horse riding once a week. And I recently started driving lessons i currently don’t study as everything feels too messy for that right now, but I was before and I studied art which my father wasn’t a huge fan of because I “couldn’t make a career out of it”. he says I wasn’t like this back in school. If that’s so then what happened to me? What made me the person that I am? One that isn’t adventurous and doesn’t try things without thinking… he also claimed that I was a “top student” even though my grades were C on average lol and crazy thing. He says if I want him off my back, I should just do it. I’m sorry, but why should this be a reason? It sounds ridiculous does he also do this with my brother you may ask? The answer is no. But my brother is in a better position than I am. He’s at uni studying computer science and has a good job and is more fit than me. I get compared to him sometimes which feels unfair but also, is he lying? one could say “you decide what to do” but once again I can’t. So this is probably why I am still treated like a school child. Father even said in the past that I should be in a school like environment where I am just told what to do… and I can’t do nothing, he thinks I am not busy enough. Kids my age stay up all night studying. That speaks a lot about my own character. I could be 10x busier than I am and I can’t really say “no” to what he suggests because when I do he says “how do you know if you never tried it?” “No venture no gain” um… I think this is all and I don’t want this to be too long. My mind is very conflicted on this entire situation. Is he too controlling or am I not decisive or do I just need to be told what to do? Please let me know your honest thoughts. If this post was bothersome in some way, I am sorry. I am new to this app and don’t really know where to go. This is it I think.

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