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Jfab
3 137 M Embraced 1
PathStep 1 Compassion hearts7 Forum posts2 Forum upvotes2 Current upvotes2 Age GroupAdult Last activeMarch, 2025 Member sinceMarch 25, 2025
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Advice and guidance .
Relationship Stress / by Jfab
Last post
 March 27th, 2025
...See more Me and my girlfriend are on a break of sorts. We still live together which makes things complicated, on top of everything else that makes it complicated. She says I’ve been emotionally unavailable for around 6 months. She brought up her leaving the house and crying, but when I tried to interject and figure out what was going on, there was a lot of telling me it didn’t matter and didn’t care. Even now when I try to pry and ask what it is in particular that I have done that has made her feel less than. She’s just not willing to tell me anything or give me insight. So where do I start? What are things I can start doing more of or improve on? I’m very much in love with her, and I’m willing to take accountability for what I’ve done, or haven’t done. I just don’t know where to start.
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Need relationship/breakup advice
Relationship Stress / by Jfab
Last post
 March 28th, 2025
...See more So my girlfriend, I’ve kind of felt her withdrawing for a little bit, and not this past weekend, the one before it I felt it hard. And I told her about it, like going to meetings together. She said she was picking a few people up and I asked if there was room for me, and there was we could have made it happen. But oh was met with a more of an oh well and a shrug. And she spent the weekend with her mom and daughter cause her mom came up from down south. So Monday I had to pick something up from a post office where we used to live. It was a set of matching promise rings. Her attitude completely changed when I got out of the post office, and we wound up arguing a little bit. And when we got to the hotel to drop me off we continued talking and she really wasnt talking that much. She did refuse to take the ring. So she then went in about how Ive become emotionally unavailable over the past 6 months or so. I pressed to get some solid examples so l could try and take the accountability necessary to work on things. She kind of refused like she has since then. So since I couldnt get answers on whats going on, I gave her the ring and I got out of the car. She then texted me  .so whats going on?. So I went back to the car and asked her what she meant. Then she said she felt like we were on 2 separate paths, and didnt know if she wanted to continue things, so I got back out and left. We didnt speak for the rest of the night. I did how ever write a letter to her while everything was fresh. And we didnt talk Tuesday either but I wasnt sure how that was going to go over. But Wednesday she came back to the hotel to shower and I guess chill till she had to get her daughter. She initiated having sex, and was like refusing to kiss me. She brought up how it was like a booty call. That really got me, it hurt. And I just assumed it was like a making up type deal, which to her it clearly wasnt. I told her it was really confusing and I didnt know if it was a good idea for me. And she seemed frustrated about that. But if you dont plan on working things out why are we going to play these games cause it going to make things so much harder than they already seemingly to be. And she like made fun of me about it, which is wild. Because im in love with her. We wound up having sex again and it was a horrible idea, it’s killing me. And last night when she was getting changed I kind of grabbed her and was hugging her, and she hit me with . dont do this and then say Im teasing you or leading you on or confusing you. So I backed off. The actions are contradicting the words. And she tells me shes confused too. She told me after we slept together the first time her daughter told her the night before she loved me and that made her emotional. Then invited me to go to a late lunch with her and her daughter. And I guess I took that wrong to cause when I was dropped off I tried kissing her and she completely dodged it and gave me a dirty look cause I showed disappointment. We still live together and I would never kick her out or tell her shes gotta get her *** out or anything like that. But at what point do I set a boundary and protect myself? Shes not giving me any type of hints about what it is exactly I need to work on and do better for her, and im not a mind reader. How can I be there for her and try and fix the emotional availability when she wants the space obviously. Im just really confused, depressed, and heart broken cause i seemingly cant have the intimacy i crave with her. What do i do?
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