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KeyAndCravat
204 M Embraced 2
PathStep 9 Compassion hearts8 Forum posts2 Forum upvotes3 Current upvotes3 Age GroupAdult Last activeJune, 2016 Member sinceOctober 28, 2015
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Not quite sure of myself
Depression Support / by KeyAndCravat
Last post
 October 30th, 2015
...See more I'm very happy that I found this app/website. It has helped me more than I have ever wished for. People and listeners are so incredibly nice and helpful and I just can't believe that something this good actually exists. But, a problem I face with this, is I feel obligated to use it every single day. My mind just screams at me saying that I've been faking my whole illness(es) because I don't need help every single waking moment. Sometimes I can make it through the day without needing a shoulder to lean on, but those days often have their downfalls because I'm immediately thinking and overthinking about how I'm just a liar and a fake and an insult to every, and anyone with a mental disorder/illness. And then comes the thoughts of my self-doubt and pity. I feel as if I'm a terrible person because my brain just tells me I'm making all this up to get more attention. I feel like a pathetic waster of space and air and I have no reason or desire to live. It's honestly frustrating because I just want to be okay for one day and when I think I actually am, it goes straight to hell and I end up being worse than the day before.
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