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Loxleyk1
85 M Embraced
PathStep 17 Compassion hearts6 Forum posts5 Forum upvotes2 Current upvotes2 Age GroupAdult Last activeApril, 2016 Member sinceMarch 11, 2016
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Is this assault? ***Trigger Warning****
Trauma Support / by Loxleyk1
Last post
 March 26th, 2016
...See more I was taken to a nudist beach in Gran Canaria in January with my partner at the time. As far as I knew, we were just sunbathing. My partner kept pushing for me to 'try new things' & wanted me to have sex with someone else for him to watch. I didn't want to do this. The day went on and I managed to say no all day. Then he allowed someone to massage me, which I felt was 'OK' because they were not touching me and as soon as it went 'too far' I said no. 
 Later on, I made a comment when a nice looking guy walked past. Just said that he was nice looking. I didn't wish anything of it at all. My partner disappeared for a while and when he came back, he brought the man back with him. He asked him to massage me whilst he watched. I wasn't keen at all on the idea but he wasn't doing anything 'wrong'. Then my partner threw a condom onto my chest and insisted that the man have sex with me. By now there were many people around. I shook my head and told my partner 'no' so many times, but instead he just gave the man thumbs up and allowed him to have sex with me. I laid there not moving or doing anything, wishing the whole thing would just finish. As soon as it was 'done' I lost it & we left. Is this assault? I can't help but feel that because I didn't say no to the man that he didn't care much. And because I said he was nice looking, I can't help but feel it's my fault. Now, the thought of having sex with anyone physically repulses me & I try to avoid thinking about it at all costs. I'm so confused, someone please help.
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