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Marian09
2 2,569 M Hopeful Heart 5
PathStep 2 Compassion hearts238 Forum posts2 Forum upvotes3 Current upvotes3 Age GroupAdult Last activeSeptember, 2026 Member sinceMarch 22, 2019
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My executive dysfunction is making me depressed
Depression Support / by Marian09
Last post
January 21st
...See more Hey everyone. I hope your days are going easy. I also hope you can help me a bit. I'm unsure if this is a depression issue. I don't have a diagnosis, but a lot of my symptoms do look like depression: I have zero energy to do anything. I wake up, play with my cat, have breakfast...and immediately feel sleepy again. As if I hadn't eaten and drank coffee. Now, I have quite a lot of debt on me. I'm a freelancer, and while I have some secure gigs here and there, it's not enough. I recently bought some equipment to make crafts, and I had a ton of orders in December. Now I'm getting ready for Valentine's but...idk, I feel completely unmotivated. I'm already anticipating failure, that I will get no orders and no profit. I get very downlifted when browsing craft FB groups, due to people getting tons of orders, but also due to those who sell really, really cheap. I know I need to move my stuff around in social media. Build a portfolio, make posts, talk to schools and small stores. The thing is, I just can't find the energy 😭. I don't know if this is executive dysfunction, but I try to set up a plan to do samples, take pics and post, but then I remember I need to do some other important thing, and then something else pops up during the day that needs to be taken care of, and I just can't go back to the first task as easily. Like, I leave a just finished box, ready to take photos of it, but then I start doing other things and when I return to the box, hours have passed. It's a bad cycle of me not being able to accomplish simple tasks, getting anxious about it, wasting time worrying, not accomplishing more tasks, and so on and so forth. I really need some input into how to break this cycle. The usual tips of "Make a plan, get rid of distractions, use pomodoro" don't seem to work. I just feel the time slipping away between my fingers and don't know how to stop it 😥. Thank you in advance.
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Currently overwhelmed with work and my mind is completely blocked.
Anxiety Support / by Marian09
Last post
October 14th, 2023
...See more Hello everyone. I hope you are having a great morning/dat/evening 😊. So, I wanted to vent a little, and ask for some advice if you can provide it. I'm currently having a lot of responsibilities, and my mind is just fogged. I have a pile of work to do, calls to make, bills to pay, but I cannot bring myself to really start any of them, and deadlines are just getting closer. Whenever I'm about to start one task, I find myself procrastinating and getting distracted with some videogame, video or read. I will suddenly get hungry and go grab some snack "to focus" (of course, I don't). Every single, little task will take forever for me to make. Take a shower? Be in the bathroom for 1 hour. Dinner? 1.5 hours. This keeps going until, you guessed, it's suddenly 2AM and I need to go to sleep. Very little was done during the day. Now, I know I have anxiety issues like not really liking making phone calls, so whatever task requires me to do those I will drag it. The rest of the tasks I will overthink and overworry about their future outcome; "do I really have enough time to make this sculpture?" "I want to try using a new method but what if it fails? I would have wasted money and time". The thought of wasting anything terrifies me and takes over my mind, freezing me. Quick example: I'm currently in charge of my condo building maintenance. We have had not public water supply this past week so very probably I will have to call a private supplier tomorrow to fill the water reservoir. I'm already dreading that. But, to make it worse, my brother left an open sink faucet for almost half an hour and I got REALLY mad about it. We have a water shortage and he goes and just casually forgets an open faucet!! But, anyhow, even after I explained to him why this was really bad, now I'm obsessing over that incident, imagining all the ways I could have stopped it from happeninh (yes, I make everything my responsibility :/ ). Even tomorrow I know I will be thinking on how I could have noticed the open faucet sooner and saved us way more water. So, all of these thoughts just get one over the other: anticipation, thinking of fixing errors, second guessing. I'm just so tired. Is there any method you can share to break this damn cycle? I feel like I'm rolling downhill trying to grab something but everything just slips my hand. I need something to stop for a moment and regroup myself :'( . That's the end of my rant. Thank you all for reading me and for the advice you can provide.
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