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MischievousMia
1 1,242 M Little Steps 3
PathStep 1 Compassion hearts54 Forum posts3 Forum upvotes3 Current upvotes3 Age GroupAdult Last activeApril, 2023 Member sinceFebruary 28, 2021
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I'm someone whose daily challenges are just starting to overwhelm me and I'm looking for some help.


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Need Advice.
Personality Disorders Support / by MischievousMia
Last post
March 7th, 2021
...See more I don't even know where to start really. I have been living with and managing my BPD on a daily basis for over 20 years, I also have Schitzoaffective Disorder along with PTSD from past life events, and it feels like they are all having a 3 way cage match and I'm the gal caught in the middle and taking all the damage from everything. The pandemic has completely and thoroughly destroyed what was once a very robust and healthy support system and I have been trying to self manage as best as possible without any clinical, peer, family or friend support for over 6 months now and all of the coping strategies I have learned over the past 20+ years are all starting to fail miserably and I have modified them in every way possible as time went on to make them still viable for as long as possible. I have tried reaching out to new people as well as some old ones to try and rebuild a new support system, but because these are hard issues for most people who don't have any lived life experience or understanding past what the media and Hollywood feeds them, it feels like I am screaming into the wind when trying to connect with people and help them understand the internal f4 tornado currently rampaging my whole body and mind. I am definately in an acute phase of my BPD and I suspect also my Schitzoaffective has also entered an acute phase. I am connected with my local mental health agency, but a little over a year ago and just 2 months before the pandemic I had my longtime worker switched due to her taking a new position. I have tried working with her replacement and we haven't been able to make a connection and I had requested a new one and was turned down and told I would have to work with the new one or no one, which I find to be a little inflexible, especially considering the pandemic and my acute state. Anyways I have absolutely no idea how to find people that understand and can connect with me to give me the much needed help and support to at least get me into the recovery phase. I live alone, am an orphan, have no friends really because of the struggles I have in making them, and even my coworkers are somewhat distant because as much as I try to hold it together at work, cracks and slips have been happening throughout the day that have become noticeable and now I fear for losing my job, which I am crazy lucky to still have during the pandemic. Anyone have any advice on how I can effectively rebuild a support structure given my current situation? Thanks for listening.
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