Mysterious405 Member Profile

...See more I have been questioning my religion for quite a while. My family are all Muslims, but I started questioning religions and am now prone to Deism. I tried telling this to my mum but she started crying and begging. She asked me "how do you know I'm your mum?" I said "because I believe you" then she asked "do you believe we want the best for you?" I said "yes" and then she said "then follow Islam" she told me my grandad is Muslim, she is Muslim so I'm Muslim. She told me not to research too much about religion, to follow what she currently knows and to follow and believe in the good parts of the religion. So that it wouldn't be a sin to know too much but not acting upon them. After crying I finally gave in and said 'ok ok I got it" after she cried even more after she asked me "what would you tell other people your religion is?" I said "deism", and when I told her she was forcing me to believe she just said she was trying to explain me, she wanted me to believe (forcibly) but she didn't want it to be forced if you know what I mean. Then she patted my head and was like "I love you and that's why you'll listen to me regarding religion'. Also when she was crying she said that I can have support like counselling when I say she "hurts" me but who will support HER and that made me feel really guilty. Now I feel like I'm being manipulated with/by the love of my mum and I feel trapped. This gave me anxiety and made me cry multiple times, which also gave me a slight fever.

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