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Nekotheuzachan
11,540 M Pacing Forward 6
PathStep 13 Compassion hearts99 Forum posts8 Forum upvotes8 Current upvotes8 Age GroupAdult Last activeApril, 2019 Member sinceOctober 4, 2014
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I feel so stupid for thinking this, but I've recently been thinking of {Edited}.[TRIGGER WARNING]
Depression Support / by Nekotheuzachan
Last post
 April 11th, 2015
...See more Hey, ehm, I was iffy about sharing this because even after reading the community rules, I'm still not completely sure what's aloud... but I've been suicidal for a while now. Yes, I know "things will get better" and "suicide doesn't just end the chance for things to get worse, it ends the chance for things to get better too," but these quotes only do so much. Why is it that -- even though people are constantly saying they will -- things never get better? I've given my life a chance, a very long one in my opinion, and my hope seems to have failed me. I'm going through what feels like so much... but for what? To get a good life? What does that matter? Why wait for this terrible life to get better when I can just take the easy way out? I can just end it all. I know that these are the words of a coward, but I cannot take it any longer! I cannot take this anymore. I've given God -- or Buddha -- such a long long long time... so why hasn't it gotten better? Maybe I'm expecting too much out of life... but... I don't think it's supposed to be like this. Life isn't supposed to be something you have to bear... its something you want to fulfill! But I don't want that... please, if anyone knows how to make me feel happy -- or at least not terrible -- I'm open to suggestions.
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