PeachyPeach7 Member Profile

...See more Hi everyone, I am new to 7cups. So I’m not sure if I’m doing this thread correctly. If anyone can guide me in finding a support group that deals with this topic, that would be great. 2 years ago, I was in a four year relationship. Out of that relationship I ended up pregnant. After some consideration, I decided to terminate my pregnancy. I was 25 at that time, I started a new job, I still live at home with my mom. I was honestly very surprised and slightly happy, and yet very scared of that pregnancy. I just knew the moment wasn’t right, I know I would like to bring a child into this world when I am settled. During my teenage years & adulthood, my mom had embedded this fear into me that she would kick me out of the house if I ever ended up pregnant. With so many factors, I decided to abort. To this day, I feel very conflicted about it. My ex broke up with me two months after I terminated. Although he was supportive with my decision, he wasn’t emotionally supportive. Therefore, I felt like I bottled up a lot of my feelings. I felt very alone after we ended things because I didn’t have anybody else to talk about what I went through. Within time, I noticed my mom would heavily bring up abortion into our conversations. I had a hunch that she knew what I did. I have a feeling she probably went through my things and found paperwork about it. I honestly wanted to keep this to myself, deal with it on my own. But it’s always been hurtful whenever my mom brings it up and shares her conservative opinions, how sinful it is to abort. Last week my mom and I got into an argument. She took me by surprised, and brought up that she knew that I aborted. She shamed me and guilt me over it. We were supposed to go on a Europe trip together next month. She decided to remove me out the flight and hotel reservations to punish me. She has given me an ultimatum of seeking a religious group to talk about my abortion or else she doesn’t want to talk to me. This has been so hurtful, and I find it very toxic and immature of her to punish me for something I did two years ago. I wish she would realize how unhinged it is. And how it affects me. I also hope she would notice how her actions have made me not confide in her for any help. I feel like I shouldn’t have to explain to her for what I did. And I’m quite grown to have made the decision for myself. Do I feel great about it? No. And I don’t think I ever will. But it was a decision that was right for me at that time. Has anyone experience this before? Feeling conflicted after an abortion. And has had issues with family finding out about it ?

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