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PinkManY2k
619 M Embraced 5
PathStep 25 Compassion hearts19 Forum posts1 Forum upvotes1 Current upvotes1 Age GroupAdult Last activeJanuary, 1970 Member sinceJune 21, 2015
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Long distance relationship .
Relationship Stress / by PinkManY2k
Last post
 October 20th, 2016
...See more Hello ,  Few Months ago i had some huge problems with the people that i talk to everyday (parents,siblings,friends,ex friends)...it was really hard for me to keep living like that , i thought there was no meaning to my life , that i was nothing in their eyes...they hurt me everyday , i don't why...i did not do anything bad :/ . So I met a girl (her name is daniella) on interenet ​(She had a boyfriend) We talked everyday for hours , she was really special , she has brighten up my days , made me smile everymorning , she made my life worth living (She was better than my Girlfriend) ! We've gotten close...very close to each other . We had almost the same problems (my parenst were fighting and her parents hated her because she converted from Christianity to Islam "muslim" , so they treat her like trash and hurt her everyday)  , we understood each other . One day HER boyfriend cheated on her for the 4th time, she was really hurt, i was there for her . Few days later , my parents went worse...very worse (i was mouring everyday)  , my Girlfriend cheated on me :( (for the 1st time but she wasn't the 1st one who did this to me) I really loved her , i took our realtionship seriously ... that night , i called daniella , told her that i'm going to attempt suicide...she cried and begged me to not do that because i was the closest person to her , she only had me to talk to , i was the only one for her (same for me) because she lived in the middle of nowhere... i didn't listen to her , took some pills but not enough because i was so scared to die, my sister's fiancé was home and took me to the hospital , i stayed there for 3 days straight no contact with daniella...i went back home found on facebook a post about me that explains her feelings , when i saw it i got emotional because i understood how much she wanted me to stay in her life . She told me that she couldn't stop crying even her grandmother kicked her out for the whole day . Then I fell in love with her , i didn't have the guts to tell her , still i was hurting myself because i couldn't be honest with her , few days (over 5 days) i called and asked her to not talk to me again (it was the hardest thing i've ever did) ... she cried again :/ , she said it ... she said that she loves me , i got what i wanted but i wasn't ready to be in a relationship (i was hurt over 6times and daniella was way better than me in almost everything) i didn't say anything  , hang up and blocked her from everything, as usual :( i couldn't stay without talking to her , i unbloked her and told her that i love her too , we texted and had a nice conversation . We remain a couple . I had some problems with the time (we had 6hours difference between us), i slept the day and talked to her the night (it's almost 6am here now) , i gave up on my "real friends"...i totally trade everthing for a girl . I couldn't lose her again... Now everything changed on me , i want to get my old life style back , sleep the night and wake up the day , have fun with my friends again ... anyway i don't want to live like a zombie anymore . I love her so much to break up with her but i have a feeling...that tells me to do that not only because of the time but i just want to be single (maybe because i wasn't ready to be in a relationship i guess ?)  still ,  i'm just afraid of me to get back with her again...  I don't want to make a schedule or tell her to stay up the night to talk to me or talk to her only the weekends . I JUST WANT TO BE SINGLE WITHOUT HURTING EACH OTHER AND NOT GOING BACK TO HER AGAIN .  i'm now asking for her help , opinions and advices . Thank you all . 
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