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Selaviex
264 M Embraced 2
PathStep 7 Compassion hearts21 Forum posts1 Forum upvotes7 Current upvotes7 Age GroupAdult Last activeSeptember, 2024 Member sinceSeptember 9, 2024
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I feel so betrayed
General Support / by Selaviex
Last post
 September 10th, 2024
...See more TW - past crisis behaviour So first I want to mention that I’m currently in professional care and am not suicidal at the moment. I just need a place to vent and get a different kind of support/perspective on my situation. I sent goodbye messages to people and when I woke up because the pills didn’t do what I wanted them to, I realised that one of my friends just had blocked me everywhere. I tried to call him but he just told me that he will block my number now as well. I went inpatient after this experience trying to deal with the distress this caused me. My friends didn’t know where I was, the police couldn’t tell them as well because I asked for it to be a secret. I just got told that they messaged him letting him know that I’m probably not alive anymore because they thought I went through with it and he just blocked them as well. He blocked them after being told I’m dead!!!  at the moment I’m not sure how to recover from this. I trusted this person and they just abandoned me when I would have needed support the most. Blocked other people after being told I’m dead. How do you recover from something like this? I don’t know how to trust people at the moment. There’s only one person left I’m talking to, to the rest I broke off the contact because I’m scared something like this is going to happen again. I have nightmares and cry a lot or feel nothing at all. Everything just feels too much and I’m trying to think of myself but all I can ask myself is: What did I do to deserve something like this?  I always try to be a good person. Am there for people, treat everyone with kindness and love wherever I go. Why are there people constantly coming into my life and hurting me in the most cruel way possible? I just want to figure the situation out but I can’t and my mind is spinning constantly. thank you if you read until here. I just wanted to get that off my chest. 
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