StereoBrick Member Profile

...See more My life has really been off for the past 2 days/nights...insomnia has kicked in, and I only get a few hours of sleep when the sun comes up. I work from home and have REALLY been struggling to do work that is needed to be done. Instead, I've been just sitting watching a show, strolling through chat and the forums I go to (dealing with depression and CSA), and stress eating. I'm pretty sure the catalyst for all of the anxiety/deep depression is one of my close friends who texted me that he was going to "drop me as a friend" because I hadn't talked to him/reached out in two weeks. During those two weeks I've been isolating because of work I've had to finish, have been feeling a lot of pressure and I'm dealing with a lot of things from my past right now (trying to heal from CSA and he knows about it). When I expressed this to him, he just got defensive and basically told me everyone has pressures and it only takes 5 minutes to pick up the phone and call. Then he tried to play off the "drop you as a friend" comment as a humor venting type comment and not serious, but I just felt so betrayed and couldn't shake the feeling. I want to climb out of this hole, but I feel so tired, sad, confused - pretty much giving up on responsibilities and people. Any ideas? Not expecting to be "cured" in an hour, heck, even today/this week, but I don't want to lose work relationships and the potential for more jobs. I also don't want to go so far backwards in my healing process after I've been making so much progress with trying to be more open/trusting again. FML.

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