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Thegreypuffin
238 M Embraced 2
PathStep 1 Compassion hearts19 Forum posts1 Forum upvotes8 Current upvotes8 Age GroupAdult Last activeAugust, 2023 Member sinceAugust 15, 2023
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Hi y’all
Newbie Hub / by Thegreypuffin
Last post
 August 16th, 2023
...See more I’m just not even sure this will work either. No one ever knows what to say to me. I’m a 48 year old lady who was abused as a little girl. Mama was a narcissist, daddy was passive, big brother a predator. The golden boy. These are issues I’ve processed and mostly learned to live with. I had a little girl, and my husband left at 23. I got 3 jobs and. a journalism degree with my parents help. It saved me a lot in childcare and they adored her. She was my everything. I stayed alive for her. I didn’t realize what was going on while I was at work. While my brother wasn’t allowed around her (they let him anyway), I thought I was a vigilant if tired parent. Every moment I was gone, it wasn’t him harming her. It was my mother. “Oh sweetie, your ma tries so hard bless her heart. She just can’t give you the things you need. She is so ill in her brain “. That was the narrative I was unaware of for years. She left home ten years ago. She is grown now. She tells people I beat and tortured her as a child. While I wasn’t even close to perfect, I was a good mother. And I never ever abused my daughter. She knows this and has apologized but keeps it going. I haven’t seen her in years now. The last time I called her my brother answered her phone. My father died and they didn’t call me or tell me anything. I found his grave and I go there and cry daily. Everyone abandoned me 6 years ago when I finally went no contact with mom and brother. Cousins, extended and immediate family. Everyone. I can’t go on like this much longer. No one alive loves me anymore. I am physically breaking down. if someone out there understands, I’m begging for a hand to hold.
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