TributeTripe Member Profile

...See more Me (26) and my partner (30) have been together 5-6 years. I'll leave a TLDR at the bottom. Our relationship started long distance and was a bit rocky. I questioned a lot of things and this is my first relationship. When we moved in together, after months of feeling crazy, being called crazy and going to therapy, I discussed he had a lying issue. It was about everything. We had to rebuild our relationship from the ground up. We had a trauma bond and I loved him so I stayed. For 4.5 years he kept lying to me. We'd have months of no lies, then months of lies, then discovery. Cycle repeats. This last year he has been completely honest. I feel safer, but its like my want for him is gone. I am unsure if its because I'm healing and not able to. I was technically SA-ed non-violently. So I was hyper sexual for a while then nothing. But I'm so confused. When we do things together I just get the ick lately because hes always arguing. We play games, he rages. He argues with people online on Next-door everyday now. I feel dependent and like I shouldn't leave emotionally. Added to that, I lost my job and one of our dogs needs surgery. I am financially dependent right now as well. I dont understand why I cant just decide what to do about the relationship. TLDR: My partner was abusive to me at the start of our relationship but has been healthy the past year. I thought things would get better, but I struggle to feel romantically for him now compared to when he was emotionally abusive.

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