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TruknTmbr92
66 M Embraced
PathStep 2 Compassion hearts8 Forum posts2 Forum upvotes3 Current upvotes3 Age GroupAdult Last activeMay, 2023 Member sinceApril 7, 2023
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I’m a mess and have no clue how to fix my head
Grief & Loss / by TruknTmbr92
Last post
 April 23rd, 2023
...See more So little back story here……. Mom and dad divorced when I was 12, not really a big deal then, my dad ends up remarrying and has another child in early 2014, I was born in 1992. My father raised my brothers and I to be our own person and have our own opinions, insert issues with my father over me being me and voicing my opinion on his new wife. Fast forward to June 2022, I finally purchased my first motorcycle and as I was enjoying that moment in life, I had decided to try and fix things with my dad and that I would ride my bike up to visit him on July 4th. Well the weather wasn’t favorable for riding the bike and I couldn’t afford to take the truck so I didn’t go, and I had it in my head that this was a conversation that needed to be done in person, so I said there will be another weekend I can ride up. July 10th I received the phone call that nobody expects to receive, dad had passed away unexpectedly the day prior, to say I was devastated would be an understatement. Within a day we had a time for a family only viewing before dad was cremated, and had a date set for his celebration of life. That date just so happened to be July 17th, my birthday, my 30th at that. So how does one deal with the guilt of being ready to fix the relationship but failing to act in time? How does one not let the fact that your 30th birthday is the day you held your fathers celebration of life mess with your head?
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