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arianatravels
185 M Embraced 1
PathStep 14 Compassion hearts14 Forum posts2 Forum upvotes3 Current upvotes3 Age GroupAdult Last activeSeptember, 2024 Member sinceSeptember 15, 2024
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Long distance, long term
Anxiety Support / by arianatravels
Last post
 September 16th, 2024
...See more My fiancé and I are currently long distance, and it’s taking a toll on me. We met in his country because I am completing a degree there, but this past year I have been back and forth between our countries. I don’t want to be there anymore, I only go back to his country to renew my visa and be with him (all I have left for my degree is my thesis). He originally told me he will come to my country to be with me when I graduate, but now he’s saying he’s having second thoughts and he doesn’t think he will like life there. What led to this comment on his end is that I told him today that I don’t want to live long term in his country, and I am moving back to my country as soon as I can (I have told him this many times but since I am still working on getting citizenship in his country through my blood line, I don’t think he has been taking it seriously). Today, however, I was much more firm, and said that I cannot take this back and forth anymore and I will come still next month and stay through the end of the year, but after that I will return to my country until graduation. He then said that he gave himself next year as a limit for moving to my country, and I told him that the visa processing takes an entire year and that’s why I’ve been telling him to apply + I’ve explicitly told him that processing time many times, so he hasn’t been listening. While we were talking, I explicitly said “I want it to be very clear that I DON’T want us to break up” and he started to get anxiety so badly that he vomited on the video-call with me multiple times. He ended the call so he could vomit more, laid down and had water, messaged me and I call him. He told me he needs to sleep and we said goodnight I love you. i don’t know where to go from here, and the anxiety puking stunned me as he’s never had that occur before.
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