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ariiiana
3 70 M Embraced
PathStep 1 Compassion hearts19 Forum posts1 Forum upvotes13 Current upvotes13 Age GroupAdult Last activeAugust, 2025 Member sinceAugust 22, 2025
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Autism and loneliness
Autism Support / by ariiiana
Last post
 November 5th, 2025
...See more I suspect I might be on the autism spectrum, as I have felt different all my life and never truly belonged. I’ve lived in different cities and even in other countries, and I’ve interacted with people of various backgrounds and ages, but the feeling of not belonging has never left me. I seem unable to truely connect or resonate with people, which has made me feel extremely lonely and isolated, eventually causing me to lose my will to live. For several years, life has been very difficult for me, as I have not like it, I’ve been feeling extremely lonely, and I’ve been struggling to keep going only for my family and loved ones. Throughout my life, I have met only two people with whom I could truly connect and be myself around, who made me feel understood, accepted, and like I belonged. One of them is an old classmate from university, with whom I don’t talk much anymore as we now live in different countries. The other is one of my flatmates, whom I met only about a month ago and who is on the autism spectrum. Having him as a friend made life feel easier for me. It made me feel that I could keep going because I wasn’t alone all the time anymore. But yesterday, he announced that his girlfriend would be moving in with him (I didn’t even know he had a girlfriend, as he had never mentioned her to me). Since she moved in, he hasn’t really talked to me—apart from saying hello or exchanging other polite words—which is understandable I think. But I feel as though I’ve lost a friend. More than that, I’ve lost one of the only two real friends I’ve ever had, one of the only two people who have truly understood me in my entire life, and the only person I could talk to right now, as I live in a foreign country and don’t know many people. It doesn’t bother me that he has a girlfriend—I’ve never thought of him romantically. I’m just sad that I’ve lost a friend and I miss having someone to talk to. I feel like I’m grieving, and the feelings of loneliness and isolation have hit me harder than before. I’m anxious and afraid that I might not be able to cope with it much longer.
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