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blueJar7683
90 M Embraced
PathStep 1 Compassion hearts12 Forum posts2 Forum upvotes4 Current upvotes4 Age GroupAdult Last activeFebruary, 2022 Member sinceFebruary 17, 2022
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Talking myself out of help?
General Support / by blueJar7683
Last post
 February 17th, 2022
...See more I find myself struggling almost daily with this. Is there really something going on? Is there truly something off in my brain, or am I just overthinking? The thought of seeing a professional, only to be told that I’m fine, is terrifying. I don’t feel fine, but I don’t know exactly what’s wrong, so I must just be normal, right? Everyone has problems, why am I making mine out to be so huge? This cycle has been feeding itself for literally years. The first time I was able to reach out to a professional, I was given medication that I could not take while pregnant after expressly stating the fact. That was 10 years ago. 8 years ago, I found the strength to try again. This time, I was put in group therapy because of being uninsured, and I found myself comparing my problems with others, and realized that they needed help way more than I did. They were struggling through things like divorce, custody battles, addictions; I had a job, custody of my kids, and a warm place to sleep. I told myself I was being weak, and should feel ashamed that I considered myself on par with those folks going through their problems. I guess it feels like I’m drowning, screaming for help, but I keep telling myself I could stand up if I wanted to.
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