brianna5420 Member Profile

...See more My boyfriend and I are in a commited relationship and have been for 7 months now. I’m worried this will be our last month if I can’t get over my insecurities. In the past I have dealt with infidelity with my first boyfriend, who was abusive. That left me with a lot of trauma and insecurities, I was never the same after that relationship. After social media stocking, and phone checking. I realized that my boyfriend regularly likes and comments on other girls posts some of which are models and one he described as a “cute crackhead” in the midst of an argument I started over being upset that he was giving these other girls attention, but he’s not a very attentive person in general towards those around him. I let these things bother me for a while and now I am realizing I need to actually try and look nice and take care of myself like I did, but it seems that my very independent self has fell into some codependency. Now I feel very discouraged trying to look nice, I have a mental breakdown if I didn’t eat for a few days because I know I’m losing weight and I just wanna have a big butt like all the gorgeous models everywhere. He told me it was unrealistic to look like them and that maybe I should start trying with myself and my life more, and while he is right I feel as though me not feeling good enough and being a perfectionist is taking a toll on how I go about my daily life and it’s harmful for us, but I know me and my boyfriend have a solid foundation and I don’t wanna keep making it worse because, I have watched him grow into a man and I feel like I have fallen far back.

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