charmingTriangle7237 Member Profile

...See more Hmm where I should start , maybe it all started in my childhood And the fact that she was sexually abused when she was 7 years old and the worst thing was that it was not only once, after that that guy left the country and a month ago I found out that he is doing very well haha... Anyway also that although I have had many "friends" I really do not feel that they are present and that in a way makes me feel alone, and that was why my childhood was "normal" I was never a student with an excellent grade but I was not one of the worst so that does not really bother me... After elementary school everything got worse, this is something that makes me ashamed but I cried in high school Because I felt lonely bad, and it's not like I had friends to vent to, so I just felt bad, but at the same time empty and that's when I tried to commit suicide for the first time. As you can see it didn't go as I would have wanted so here I am Now in high school (preparatoria, i'm from Mexico) These past couple of months I've thought more about suicide and trying again, but this time without mistakes. Now that I remember it in high school I also cut my arms, and that is something that in a way also makes me feel bad, when I was a child because my parents also beat me for "not behaving" and I think that is good because That's how they "educated" me and I also haven't told them about the abuse because it's been many years and, I'm afraid, and even with that I love them and I know that they love me but deep down I know that they don't like me, since I've also received countless insults from them in addition to the fact that my only sister hates me since I was a fetus, Fortunately I have siblings so they have also accompanied me. One thing I've been very upset about these days is because I have a "friend" who I told her all this, I had a lot of trust with her and what she did is that she told another girl who is also an acquaintance and told her what was happening to me and since I had told her by message I took it. He captures our conversation and I send it to him... But I'm also afraid to talk to him about it and not mind him since he's a person with a lot of ego and I also know that he won't take it as important as I would like. And as I said a couple of months ago I have considered suicide again, and since then I also have no desire for anything, I cry almost from the newspaper and I have no strength to do anything. I know that these "problems" They are not a big deal since I am also a teenager and I don't really have "real" problems but at least I would like to feel heard and if they wonder if I have gone to therapy. No, I haven't because We don't have money. Even if I will try to look for a free therapy program here where I live

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