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dapperPlane9428
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PathStep 1 Compassion hearts8 Forum posts2 Forum upvotes2 Current upvotes2 Age GroupAdult Last activeJuly, 2021 Member sinceJanuary 14, 2021
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Relationship Stress / by dapperPlane9428
Last post
 January 16th, 2021
...See more I’m 23 years old and had been in a relationship with my high school sweetheart since I was 17 years old. My high school sweetheart broke up with me about two Mays ago supposedly because we wanted different things. (He wanted children were as I wanted to finish my schooling first.) We got back together after one week where he called me and told me he regretted breaking up with me and drove for two hours to see me at my dorm. Two days after New Years this year, we had a talk again and in which he came up with the same “reasoning/excuse” for us to talk, when asked if he wanted to break up he didn’t give a clear answer and then said no break up. Next day I asked to reassure myself but was met again with an unclear answer. He said he was miserable with his current living situation and work situation, he wanted to find himself because he felt so lost. He said he wanted to be ready for the real world so he could provide for me and told me I deserved better. I told him I was soon graduating and I would soon be able to help him and support him like he had done so for me, but he said he didn’t want me to and didn’t want me around anymore either. The things he said hurt me a lot because I was sure we would work things out and we would overcome this issue. We were having a conversation but nothing from his side was being said. He wanted to break up, he didn’t, then yes then no then finally yes. When I felt we were done fixing this, he decided again just two days ago to finally tell me he wants to break up in person. I didn’t want to cry but tears were there and I just calmly asked him to leave my home. He started giving me excuses about not loving me anymore but they all sounded like excuses and not explanations so I again asked him to leave and when he wouldn’t I got up from my chair and was starting to head for the bathroom. He tried to grab my hand and I begged him to not grab me or touch me and asked him to please leave again and he finally did. I’m trying to not be bothered and I’m trying to not cry and I’m trying not to let this negative gut wrenching feeling in me tear me down. But it’s really hard. It’s really hard and I have a lot of questions that I want to ask but it’s better not to know right? There won’t be any answers that’ll make me feel better will there? There’s a lot I want to know and a lot I don’t. I just want to be okay, I know I’ll be okay later on but not now and I just need to have someone hear this because no one else will. They all just say to move on but don’t let me voice out how I feel. I will move on but someone hear me out please.
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