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fairmindedLand4097
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PathStep 3 Compassion hearts14 Forum posts2 Forum upvotes7 Current upvotes7 Age GroupAdult Last activeJanuary, 2016 Member sinceJanuary 15, 2016
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What to do about my condescending, patronizing friend?
Relationship Stress / by fairmindedLand4097
Last post
 January 20th, 2016
...See more I've been friends with a guy who has helped me through some stuff in my life in the last couple of years and I've listened to him, let him vent and overall tried to be supportive. He has a pattern of being condescending, patronizing and pushy. And when I get annoyed he does a form of "joking" and says, "I'm just picking on you." Then when I get so irritated I have to stop talking to him, he gets angry and implies that I am immature and I one-sided to do so. Even though I have explained to him that when I get that irritated I use that time to rest and recovery. I have told him in the most calmest way I can that I don't appreciate his comments that come across as condescending, patronizing and pushy. He says, he doesn't mean it to be condescending, patronizing and pushy and that I shouldn't get butt-hurt about it. This is going on for months now and there are times when he has said he has done it on purpose to provoke me. I realize that I should begin to distance myself from this friendship, despite the times he has helped me. I guess my question is this... how do I let this friendship go? I have a hard time because I feel some kind of debt to him for him helping me through some tough times, but I'm realizing he has a pattern of wanting to "save me," guilt tripping me when I want to take time for myself after I get irritated, not apologizing for being patronizing and not respecting my feelings. What can I do to continue to let go of this attachment?
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