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forgottenOne1983
1 811 M Little Steps
PathStep 1 Compassion hearts62 Forum posts6 Forum upvotes22 Current upvotes22 Age GroupAdult Last activeMay, 2022 Member sinceMay 15, 2022
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Crushing loneliness post divorce
35 & Over Community / by forgottenOne1983
Last post
 June 14th, 2022
...See more I’m a 39 year old male with no kids. I’ve been divorced now for 7 years and in which time I’ve mostly remained single having no real serious relationship that I can recall. I’ve been “ active” maybe three times in that entire period. I find that online dating is ultimately fruitless because of how bad the instant gratification is we have as a society today. I must admit that my looks are about a 5 but my personality is well above a 10. The job I have affords me a nice comfortable life in which I could readily support a family however I just don’t seem to be destined to have a partner. I see happy couples young and old and I just don’t understand why it’s so hard for me to be able to find a female. I am 6’4 and of decent build being an amateur weight lifter. I do not smile a lot though if any because I’m constantly experiencing loneliness and over all social resentment. The heart and soul I have burning inside of me is so kind and gentle that I saved a stunned bumble bee from underneath my work van this week. All I want to do is hold someone and tell her she’s the reason my world turns …. But I have horrible self esteem at the hands of what my ex put me through. I DO NOT have good body confidence at all. I am also not the first to approach people in public. The self checkout lanes are the biggest godsend to me. Now here is the odd thing ; when I’m at work I’m totally comfortable interacting with clients while I’m repairing their IT equipment…… get me outside of work and I’m a terrified giant lion. Just like in the Wizard of Oz. Haha Am I just being self blind ? Do I need to “man up bro” ???? This has been a very difficult 7 years and man… Why do you live for just to live by yourself ?? Thanks and blessings to you for reading.
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