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impartialJay8528
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PathStep 9 Compassion hearts11 Forum posts1 Forum upvotes3 Current upvotes3 Age GroupAdult Last activeJuly, 2022 Member sinceSeptember 9, 2018
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Lonely With Them
Relationship Stress / by impartialJay8528
Last post
 July 29th, 2022
...See more So, I know this is absolutely on me and my emotions. But I'm struggling and just need somewhere to vent this out. I'm Not good at making and maintaining friendships. I can count the number of close friends on one hand. Two of those close friends I live with. They are also married. They're also the only ones that are close enough to spend time with not on Skype. Where I run into the problems is that... lately spending time with them makes me feel even longer than when I'm alone. Like... it hurts watching them talk and be happy and feeling like I'm just... an accessory. But the thing is that I know they don't think of me that way and they've reassured me but I can't STOP thinking this way and I feel like the world's worst friend because I bounce between happy and miserable and furious because my mind won't stop waiting for the other shoe to drop. Yes, I've been to therapy, but a change of insurance has complicated things so I have to figure that out before I can go back.
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