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justmiles
99 442,738 M Meaningful Journey 13
PathStep 4 Compassion hearts80,895 Forum posts71 Forum upvotes176 Current upvotes176 Age GroupAdult Last activeNovember, 2026 Member sinceNovember 25, 2020
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recliningfate gave me this rose -->🌹










Recent forum posts
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Miles Wattts-Sober For me, Sober for good, Sober for life
Alcohol & Drug Addiction Support / by justmiles
Last post
 February 20th
...See more i had a moment of realization on valentines day, that substances were sneaking into my life again, that i was drinking and smoking without even realizing i was abusing substances again.... if that makes sense. its easy to ignore the problem, lie to ourselves about it, or simply not even notice it. the point is, all of a sudden, i noticed it. like a "woah what am i even doing?!" i was literally talking to my mother in law about taking actions to better ones life, all while taking actions to worsen my life with substances. well that's all it took! a big "im better than this" moment, "i deserve better, i owe myself better than this" id be lying if i said i wasn't ashamed in that moment. today is day 3 of my new sobriety journey, i choose to be sober, sober for me, sober for good, sober for life.
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Day 6 of Sobriety
Alcohol & Drug Addiction Support / by justmiles
Last post
 January 6th
...See more My name is miles watts and im a recovered drug addict with schizophrenia, today is day 6 of my new sobriety journey.  ive been enjoying my time off between my old job and my new one, getting lots done and focusing on my mental health lately. how are you doing? -Miles Watts
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putting the demons back in the cage
Alcohol & Drug Addiction Support / by justmiles
Last post
 April 17th, 2025
...See more I think its time i stop lying to myself. Reset the clock, start again, regroup and rebuild. My name is miles watts and im a recovering drug addict with schizophrenia. Today is day 1 of being sober.  I might be clean today. but when i cant remember the last time i used, am i really sober? well i suppose today is a good day to change that. start a sober timer and start to build on that foundation. keep a sober mindset and start building character around that.  its hard to admit thats what i need to do, but here i am admitting it. so enough talk. lets begin
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The mod that was on duty when I joined 7cups
Positivity & Gratitude / by justmiles
Last post
 April 7th, 2025
...See more When I joined 7cups, Mod Elliot was on duty. and they said welcome to cups! much love to mod Elliot for always being a super star and being awesome on the platform! it was a long long time ago but i still remember them welcoming me! :D
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the only reason im still sober
Alcohol & Drug Addiction Support / by justmiles
Last post
 March 26th, 2024
...See more day 511 of being sober extreme TW!!!!! going into detail of hallucinations and drug use in this post as well as sleep paralysis! context- i love to sleep, no i really really love to sleep. i love naps, going to bed early, sleeping in, you name it. i just like to sleep. before starting the use of substances i had sleep paralysis (what i would consider "normal" sleep paralysis) i would have hallucinations of people coming into my room, the episodes would only last a few minutes at most.  i slowly had these small episodes more and more often but then a sudden change happened in my sleep paralysis. what i would call (sever horrific episodes) please dont say "it just feels longer when youre in them" because im positive these episodes would last hours.  at first the hallucinations were the worst part. it was like my brain pulled everything scary i have ever seen in any movie into the room with me.  second- the loops. i would be certain i was awake. i would get up from bed. even call someone to tell them i had sleep paralysis! and bam i would snap back into bed, frozen, with the nightmares all around me third- out of body- i would pull myself out of my body and sometimes make it all the way outside screaming for help fourth- family. i would hallucinate that my family would come into my room and that i would fall between the bed and the wall and they wouldnt be able to find me to wake me up. "help me help me please" i would try to scream but it was like trying to talk with a really dry mouth fifth- the voice. when i would be going through all this i ussually was really upset. like mad that it was happening. i once screamed out "none of this is real! this is all bs!" and then i heard it, a voice scream back "is this not scary enough for you?!" i never put together that the sleep paralysis was linked to drug use intell both stopped at the same time. its honestly the only thing keeping me sober. god it was a scary place. one i never wish to return to.  i truely think no words could explain how scary it was, this post doesnt even come close. 
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sober for me now? what a joke.
Alcohol & Drug Addiction Support / by justmiles
Last post
 March 26th, 2024
...See more on oct 31, 2022 my boyfriend gave me an ultimatum "put the drugs in the trash or youre single" i agreed, i dumped it all, and got sober. on feb 19, 2024 my boyfriend broke up with me anyway. sigh. my friends in my aa meetings say "you have to be sober for YOU miles, you were sober for HIM now you are sober for YOU" like what?! i dont have the strength for that! i did the drugs because im weak. im still weak. what do i do? im not sure. but im still sober, only god knows how. day 511 of being sober begins.
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new journal entries with miles! 2024 here we come!
Alcohol & Drug Addiction Support / by justmiles
Last post
 January 15th, 2024
...See more My name is miles watts and im a recovered drug addict with schizophrenia. today is day 441 of being sober! ------------------------- I'm feeling good today despite some negative things happening this morning. its hard to have your train derailed when you tried so hard to keep in on the track. but the beauty in that is that you tried your best and that you can keep going knowing that. so that's just what im going to do! keep going! i want to get my ducks in a row so to speak. work on myself and my health (physical and mental). work on my relationships! work on my finances! work on my spirituality even! so yeah bad news doesn't have to mean a bad day. today is going to be great. i just need to push onward and keep my head up!
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New year New Miles!
Addiction Support / by justmiles
Last post
 August 16th, 2024
...See more My name is miles watts and im a recovered drug addict with schizophrenia. today is day 433 of being sober! I'm feeling good today! I start another semester of college tomorrow and I'm feeling very anxious over it. I have stopped dreaming about relapsing which is a pleasant change. My dreams are still very chaotic but thankfully they are of more adventurous topics rather then dark ones lately. last night a dreamt that i was a little mouse that robed banks to steal their quarters! I want to buy a set of journals off of amazon but dont have the money. i want to get a bunch of matching ones so they look good on the shelf when im old and they are all filled up! what a dorky goal lol. I decorated my desk with all my stuffed animals, hourglasses, inspirational posters, etc. (just little mood boosting things i guess) we will see if it actually helps my mood or drives me crazy with the clutter! XD I have started a new ritual in the mornings of taking my meds, feeding my fish, and feeding my sourdough starter. I have also started to call my brother who lives far away every saturday. its nice to hear from him. I really want to make a hat full of papers of each of my hobbies written on then, then each day off i will draw out of the hat and do that hobby, what do you think about this idea? how is everyone else doing? how is the progress going on sobriety? I hope you all are doing ok and know that you are important to me, and that no matter what stepping stone you are on in your path i am proud of you for being on that path. everyones path is diffrent all that matter is that you are here trying to improve yourself and im proud of you for that!
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