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kayla797
1 90 M Embraced
PathStep 1 Compassion hearts7 Forum posts1 Age GroupAdult Last activeSeptember, 2025 Member sinceJuly 9, 2025
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Break up or makeup
Relationship Stress / by kayla797
Last post
 July 9th, 2025
...See more Hello everyone, Let me start by saying I've been married for 10 years and have 2 sons under the age of 6. I've been struggling a lot in my marriage, and I need to get some things off my chest and I'm sorry my wording may be all over the place. We both work full time. I come home from work, play with our kids, make dinner, do laundry, homeschool our children, bathe/get them in bed, then start on my own school work if it's not too late. He comes home and sits on his phone or will play video games in the basement alone. From the day we got married he has always stayed up all night playing video games and doesn’t spend time with me or the kids (we were married 4 years before having kids.) Then when I don’t want to hang out with him, he acts like I’m the one being distant. I have learned his hobbies and learned to watch his favorite types of movies just to have things in common but it is not reciprocated. During my first pregnancy, on mother's day, my husband told me we didn't need to celebrate it because I wasn’t a mother yet. During that pregnancy we were renovating our home and he would watch me lift heavy furniture/climb on ladders and then pretend he didn't see me or since I didn't ask for help he didn't know that I wanted help. On my second Mother’s Day, he gave me a letter saying he didn’t want to celebrate it because he had a bad mom growing up. That really hurt—especially when I was trying so hard to be a good mom myself. (I'm not materialistic or expecting gifts. A simple "happy mothers day" or my son's hand print on a paper. I didn't have a good example of a father growing up but that has not stopped me from making sure my husband knows he is appreciated and loved by me and our sons. I had a miscarriage in February 2024, and instead of comforting me during that time, he played video games and treated me like I wasn't there. My life didn't get a break because of the miscarriage. I still had meals to make, kids to care for, tasks to be done. 2 days after we found out we were losing our baby he told me he wanted a vasectomy because “obviously my body can’t handle having kids.” That comment devastated me. It felt cruel and demeaning during one of the most painful times in my life. I thought maybe he was right, I was the heaviest weight I had ever been. So I lost 50lbs and am at a healthy BMI. While he has made no efforts to improve his health... He is willing to drop everything for other people but will not do the same for me. Anytime I mention taking a break or that I'm not happy in our marriage he involves our children and will say "Mommy doesn't love me anymore" "Mommy wants Daddy to leave" etc... I just don't know what to do anymore. Fake it till I make it and stay for our kids? There is a lot more I could type but it's all similar to the above. I'm sharing this because I need to process it. I have a lot of resentment. I’m not perfect, but I know I don't deserve to be treated like this—especially during some of the most vulnerable moments of my life. I feel hurt, unsupported, and emotionally drained. Am I being overly sensitive?
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