kindWest9403 Member Profile

...See more Hello everyone. My first post here. My wife and I would've been celebrating 13 years of marriage in October, but everything fell apart a couple weeks ago. It started as her asking for an open marriage with me thinking she wanted to experiment with women. She's 32 and has come out as bisexual a few years ago. I said no, but that I wanted to work on our marriage to see if I could reignite the spark we had. I am not a perfect husband. I recently went through the loss of my grandfather and my estranged father who was living with us while he was seeking cancer treatments. I failed to see her. I failed to be her support. Instead of going to her with my stress, I held it all in. She asked me to find my father another place to stay and I didn't listen. Every time I went to have that conversation with him, I backed down. This week on Monday, following a disagreement with her, she sat me down after work and asked for a separation. I agreed, but not without falling apart. She then went to see family the on Tuesday, where she then decided she wanted a divorce. I asked her if counseling was an option and she refused. I asked if she would be willing to talk to a therapist individually, and she said they wouldn't tell her anything she didn't already know. Wednesday I went out to find a home because she's asked me to leave. We agreed on terms of our separation and I thought there was a chance. However, after talking to my sister to have her take our dad's ashes, I learned that my wife was using ChatGPT as a stand-in for a therapist. I checked her laptop to see what she had been saying, trying to get an idea of what her thoughts were, and I found something that will scar me forever. She had been using ChatGPT to strategize leaving me. Using it to formulate how to take explicit images to share with another man. Planning to travel to see him for a period of time. Seeking advice on how to hide it all from me. I tried to arrange to talk with her one-to-one, asking my family to pick up our son so I could meet her somewhere to talk, and she outright refused. When I mentioned that I knew about her plans, she demanded I bring my son home and leave the house immediately. To say I'm devastated is a gross understatement. It's been less than 24 hours, and I'm in shambles. My life has completely come apart, and now I need to manage custody of our five year old son with her. We're coordinating the logistics of unraveling our life, with her keeping the house, the pets, and our life, while I'm thrust out to moving into an apartment and starting over. I know it'll get easier, but I'm broken. It's still fresh, but I feel like I will hurt forever.

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