looking4thesun Member Profile

...See more Hello everyone, hoping you all are well. I am new here, the site was suggested to me by someone special. I am not sure how much to put here, not used to talking about myself. I was diagnosed with depression over 10 yrs ago and was put on antidepressants at that time. It went away for a few yrs but the past 4 or so have been more down than up. A second opinion had me as bipolar and was put on lithium for a yr or so. That was nasty.. the worst yr ever. A third opinion has me as depressed. Currently on a mood stabilizer and antidepressant. Smiley happiness is rare. Negativity, anxiety, nervousness seems to be the norm. I have little ambition or drive to get out there. I live by myself in a secluded area, once the sun goes down sometimes its like a dark cloud covering my head. I find my peace in sleep, about 10 hrs a night during the week. It seems like too much I think. When I feel good its hard to recall feeling bad, sometimes I feel guilty for feeling good. Lately it seems I may have 4-5 fair days followed by 1-3 weeks of bad.. its been cycling fairly regularly. I have tried CBT.. didnt find it helpful as the therapist mostly sat in silence and handed me photocopies of CBT methods. I would welcome any of your thoughts or suggestions.. Thank you.

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