mariasabin Member Profile

...See more I'm 15 yrs old and idk I need someone to talk/relate to. I thought I was just shy ever since 7th grade. I used to be scared of ppl who were taller, being in places with older people such as high schoolers, etc. I used to be absent every time we had to individually do something in front. I get really sick bc stress during exams and I hated being judged, I felt like my classmates talked about me when I was absent and that people were always looking at me everywhere I go. Two people liked me in 7th grade, one being 2 yrs older than me n the other being my classmate. I had this feeling that I had to be crush-worthy in front of 'em, so in class and outside, I kept fixing my hair, etc. (even worse than usual) All of that went on for 2 yrs until now. Before, I loved making friends, I can still start convos. Now, I'm quiet until I talk to one of my friends, n even then I get this feeling where I've got to be interesting, funny n worth their time. I make excuses to ppl who want to bond w me bc i can't handle their attention, ever since last yr, as well as not going to parties. I can't even speak to people lots bc I'm always thinking of what to say. I don't even know why I'm like this, I can't go to the doctor n find out if I really have anxiety bc parents. I feel so stressed abt the past n future. I feel so scared of everything, I feel like shit I feel like everyone hates me even tho they obviously don't, idek why I'm feeling this way, I just feel scared all the time do i even have anxiety?

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