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misslamarr
272 M Embraced 2
PathStep 3 Compassion hearts14 Forum posts1 Forum upvotes3 Current upvotes3 Age GroupAdult Last activeMarch, 2020 Member sinceFebruary 28, 2020
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When sexual harassment makes you change
Trauma Support / by misslamarr
Last post
 March 29th, 2020
...See more I have put it back of my head for a very long time, bc I didn t realise that I am a survivor of sexual harassment. At the time I was in my early 20ies and I didn t even had the grasp of what falls under the category sexual harassment. Now I know, bc it change me in a way, that I feel so uncomfortable everytime I talk about sex. I feel so awkward. It was my second relationship and I had my first time with this guy. However things got uncomfortable with me when he started to embarrass me infront of his friends. Makes me look like a nympho and gave me a bad name. He will always say that I want to have sex and just sexualized me in order makes him look like a king. This is my first experience with sex in general and the embarrassment stuck with me. I am so tense if it comes to this topic and I will do anything so I won t get sexualized ever again by a man. It gets to a point that I can t even relax during sex and I can t come. Because of that I locked myself in a cage and limited my self-expression, when it comes to sex. The only thing I want is just being free. I feel so stuck and closed off that I have the feeling I can t express myself. I ll be 25 this year and bc of this and also my situation at home, I didn t had the enviroment to grow up properly. And that s is the only thing I want right now. To heal this wound that has been neglect for so many years.
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