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narcisse00000
1 5,121 M Seeking Light 8
PathStep 3 Compassion hearts210 Forum posts5 Forum upvotes6 Current upvotes6 Age GroupAdult Last activeDecember, 2025 Member sinceDecember 16, 2022
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just a programming uni student struggling with supposedly depression

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my school communicating makes me feel pathetic
Anxiety Support / by narcisse00000
Last post
 December 23rd, 2022
...See more i recently found out it's really difficult for me to communicate with people, especially in school. i really care about my study but i just never could come and talk to teachers about my grades etc. now when i have to study online i'm really stressed because i feel especially nervous about communicating with them online. it takes a lot of time to even just send to them my homework.. but the worst thing, this year we have to make our final school projects and because of some problems in our school we have to present them tomorrow.. i can say i didn't even start, i really wanted to choose another subject but the teacher didn't agree, she's too busy now (and i didn't want to insist) so i just chose kind of social subject and another teacher offered me to make this project.. so i have to make a survey and encourage nearly 30 people from my and parallel classes to join it. and i though it would be okay. but then i realised i don't have any friends among parallel classes.. and even among my classmates i have not enough replies. i asked almost everyone i knew and it feels so embarassing, i have literally no replies. i just feel ashamed. this really makes me feel i have no friends (even if i talk to people who are just not in my school) and i feel bullied (even if my classmates thanked me for help just literally today). i have no idea what to do now, i still can try to ask others but it feels horrible, i'm now ashamed to tell my teacher i couldn't deal and didn't even tell her earlier (even if she's a school psychologist), i don't know at all what other survey i can make in my situation, i just hate myself for choosing this subject. i turned out not as cool as i thought. now i'm just so stressed i can start crying every time i feel someone can even think anything bad about me and i'm afraid to take part in anything. i wanted to join some group but just didn't dare, because i feel everyone would just ignore me.
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