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neonhighlife
2,705 M Hopeful Heart 6
PathStep 10 Compassion hearts103 Forum posts5 Forum upvotes7 Current upvotes7 Age GroupTeen Last activeApril, 2024 Member sinceJanuary 30, 2023
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Plz tell me someone relates to this
Autism Support / by neonhighlife
Last post
 November 30th, 2023
...See more I feel so weird, and out of place. I try talking to my friends about how I feel about stuff and how my brain functions thinking they'll understand what I'm saying and talking about and I won't feel different from everyone else. I'm hoping when i talk to someone about how i am and how i feel they can relate and I can feel a little bit better about myself like I'm not a complete freakshow. But nobody thinks how I do or feels how I feel about certain stuff. Like how I only really like to eat with plastic forks or drink with plastic or silicone straws because how the metal and silver stuff feels weird in my mouth and makes my entire body feel weird, and like how the thought of my teeth touching each other or silver/metal stuff touching my teeth makes my teeth start hurting and makes my whole mouth feel icky and my body feels weird. Also like when I'm talking to someone and were around a lot of people and i start getting really excited about what i'm talking about, so i start to talk loudly and people tell me calm down and chill out because like im embarrassing them, i feel really bad because i'm not trying to and i didnt even realise i was getting loud. So when people tell me that I just stop talking altogether because I feel upset at myself and just anxious. And then also when I'm in the hallways and i lose my friends in the crowd i feel really stressed out because like there is no space and it's a lot of people who are big and tall that idk and i get scared and like its really loud because everyones talking and yelling and people are shoving people out the way and i'm just trying to get through but like, i'm scared to ask someone to move because i'm not around friends so i don't feel comfy enough or confident enough.  I'm sick of feeling this way and everything is like, idk i can't explain it i just hate it. I just don't know what to do anymore.
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