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oceanG225
84 M Embraced
PathStep 4 Compassion hearts9 Forum posts1 Forum upvotes2 Current upvotes2 Age GroupAdult Last activeApril, 2024 Member sinceSeptember 27, 2022
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Psychosis into Phobia ?
Bipolar, Schizophrenia & Psychosis Support / by oceanG225
Last post
 November 29th, 2022
...See more Hi, I’m new here. I was hoping to find someone that could relate or validate my experience. I first had a psychotic breakdown and went into psychosis 2 years ago for a week or two, then substance induced psychosis off and on for a year until I ended up in treatment/rehab and I’m now medicated and on my own recovery journey since. i am diagnosed bipolar 1 & major Cptsd. (Among other things but those are the main). there are parts of being in psychosis that i remember and one of those memories has turned into a huge phobia since. Basically I’ve never liked bugs/spiders but after this specific psychosis episode involving hallucinations/delusions about bugs/spiders - I now have EXTREME arachnophobia. Too the point that even a photo of a spider can send me into a spiral. I’m even paranoid right now just typing the word *spider*. So when this phobia is triggered I have these horrible visceral reactions - my legs lock up, convulsing/shaking, intense panic attack, crying, etc. and only my anxiety meds will completely calm me down. I’m trying to work on the phobia in therapy but it’s complicated and very hard - we think it’s all connected to the negative belief “I am not safe” that comes from other traumas in my life - like my ptsd & psychosis memories are mixing together if that makes sense¿ anyways here’s the point: has anyone else went through psychosis and then a phobia emerged? How do I work on this phobia? Do I focus on the ptsd (other traumas in my life) or the psychosis? Maybe you can have ptsd from the psychosis specifically?¿ idk if any of this makes sense, or what kind of support I’m looking for. I think I just wanna know if this is normal and is it possible to overcome? Because it’s been horrible. Arachnophobia is literally ruining my life. I won’t go in nature anymore, places I’ve seen spiders I now can’t be around those places w/out someone there - there was one in my bathroom one time and I then had to use to my roommates bathroom for a month+ Because I refused to go into mine or I’d freak out. The anxiety and paranoia with it all is just really insane and really intense. (There’s so much more - but I hope I explained enough) if anything, thanks for your time, I don’t wish this experience on anyone but I hope I’m not Alone…
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