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politeJet1071
1 100 M Embraced 1
PathStep 1 Compassion hearts8 Forum posts4 Forum upvotes5 Current upvotes5 Age GroupAdult Last activeMay, 2021 Member sinceApril 29, 2021
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Need help TW abuse and self-harm
Trauma Support / by politeJet1071
Last post
 May 5th, 2021
...See more I don't know where to go for help with this problem. I was abused as a kid. And now as an adult, whenever anyone initiates sex with me I dissociate and do whatever they want. I can't stop myself and I can't communicate that I'm not ok. It leads to sexual experiences that the other person thinks is consensual but that feels like an assault to me. The day after sex, I tend to cry and self-harm a lot. Sometimes I struggle with suicidal thoughts. (I have a safety plan in place for that.) Does anyone else have this problem and have they found a way of managing it? I can't really prevent myself from being triggered because even just a kiss can be a trigger. And I can't predict in advance when someone is going to try to have sex with me. Sometimes friends suddenly want to be "friends with benefits", so even if I think a relationship is platonic there is a chance that the other person will make a sexual advance of some kind and then I'll dissociate and not have control over what happens. I really don't know how to maintain friendships and keep myself safe. I would be grateful for any advice.
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