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quietStrawberries333
237 M Embraced 2
PathStep 33 Compassion hearts16 Forum posts4 Forum upvotes4 Current upvotes4 Age GroupAdult Last activeFebruary, 2021 Member sinceFebruary 10, 2021
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is there something wrong?
Trauma Support / by quietStrawberries333
Last post
 February 13th, 2021
...See more I am exhausted. Replaying my life and it’s taken until I am 20 to look back and see that maybe I didn’t deserve everything - but with trauma it’s also hard to see that or even reality and I have trouble trusting myself - “maybe I did deserve everything” I don’t think that outright but my body implies it often - I’m exhausted from the shame - I’ve taken so many things that I would never allow to happen to others because my parents changed my reality - I thought it was normal I thought that the smallest mistakes warranted them screaming and name calling - I thought that it was normal to have to take peoples anger in all forms I thought it was normal to always be scared - I look out for the smallest changes in people and I think that people will hate me or revoke their love if I do the smallest thing - I’ll spill a drink and fear my life - I’m exhausted - this never was normal or okay for my parents to act how they did but now I live - living as my own person - but I feel like a collage of remains from a broken family and a history of repeated pains because my bodies programmed to find what hurts it
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TW dissociation
Anxiety Support / by quietStrawberries333
Last post
 March 1st, 2021
...See more I’ve had a weird day of dissociating I’m getting really tired from it happening :( (moved by FTS @tami150)
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