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r00kss
126 M Embraced 1
PathStep 6 Compassion hearts18 Forum posts1 Forum upvotes2 Current upvotes2 Age GroupAdult Last activeMay, 2023 Member sinceFebruary 12, 2022
Bio

dark humor and anything that makes republican men uncomfortable is my forte. my cat tolerates my existence, the dog just wants me to drop a tater tot on the floor more often. my fiance thinks I'm weird, she's smarter than me...so that checks out.

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It all feels so mentally exhausting
Friendship Support / by r00kss
Last post
 June 26th, 2023
...See more I like to say I have friends, but I don't. I have people that I know. Or used to know because I've more or less just kinda of pulled away. It's not that I don't want friends. I do, some days. But most days I just want to be left alone. So, I know this is entirely my own doing. I most likely have undiagnosed complex ptsd and I've let it bleed into every aspect of my life, especially when it comes to maintaining friendships. I've been with my partner for 5yrs, and I can tell that she can tell that this has been bothering me, despite the jokes I make about how antisocial I am. But I don't exactly have the motivation to do anything about. It just feels so mentally exhausting to feel like I have to comply with the typical dynamic of a friendship after so many people I've called friends have put me in extremely undesirable situations. At this point in my life, it's like, no, I don't want to make plans to hang out. But here's a picture of my cat getting stuck inside of a White claw box I cut the sides off of for her to use as a tunnel. Why is it so hard to find someone that is completely content with just texting to complain about our incompetent coworkers, or talking about how godawful trashy reality shows are but are easier to watch because they have no plot and take less brain cells, or someone who will find my collection of puppy teeth impressive and not creepy? (I work with dogs, this is my shiney rock collection) But in all honesty, it's fine. I'm use to not having friends at this point. It's just part of my personality, like my perpetual exhaustion.
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