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sarahemily7
1 848 M Little Steps 1
PathStep 1 Compassion hearts20 Forum posts3 Forum upvotes4 Current upvotes4 Age GroupAdult Last activeJanuary, 2026 Member sinceAugust 21, 2020
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Reading social cues and fear of overthinking
20 & Over / by sarahemily7
Last post
 December 4th, 2025
...See more Hi everyone.  So something just happened to me that made me overthink A LOT. It's about a certain teacher in my university.  I wrote a test in wrong format and I was the only one to do that. In the hall, when everyone was lining up to submit the paper (the hall was very full), I approached him in the hall (far from the crowd) and I told him that I wrote in a wrong format (not really a big problem). We were standing infront of each other, and we were the only one in that spot. He dropped his jaw, frowned a bit and froze. I was like in my mind, "he was so dramatic". I glanced at him and saw that he was just staring at my eyes with wide eyes intensely for several seconds. I looked at the floor due to embarrassment, and glanced up and saw he was looking somewhere below my eyes on my face.. then quickly averted back to my eyes. Then he softened his face and eyes, but to very neutral face, less widened eyes with no emotion, but intense eyes for like almost 1 minute. No blinking no moving at all. His body was leaning towards me (he is taller than me). Just looking at my eyes. Then after a minute or so, he told me to just submit the paper Sometimes when he was walking in the hall and i am standing there, he would just stare at my eyes without expression and even tilts his head to me to continue stare at me as he passes by. He's pretty young and good-looking (he may not be good looking for many people but he is for me) I wanna know if I am overthinking things?there are other scenarios too but I'm not gonna type it out in this text wall.. Maybe I overthink? Maybe not? But that's what happened and so far no one can tell what just happened. Like why he did that
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My anxiety : I don't want to be born a southeast asia girl.
Anxiety Support / by sarahemily7
Last post
 February 16th, 2021
...See more I may sound childish and immature... I'm from southeast asia and I really wish that I was born caucasian/european. In other words: white. Some people said mean things to me for being a southeast asian girl: that I'm ugly, have white fever but can only attract desperate old white men, desperate for money because of lower society, and very submissive. Being a caucasian (european, Northern middle east, etc..) would make me much more beautiful, because their facial structure is much more attractive. Nobody wants to have wide nose, not attractive eyes, goldish skin, and to be short. Short as in 5'3 and below. Before people told me that, I have already known the harsh reality. Our society is considered to be quite low (underprivileged) and looked down upon. People have already remarked that southeast asian girls are among the ugliest compared to other nations. And we are overrated because we have "white fever" out of desperation to escape the economic falldown, while actually, no one really find us attractive, except those who are already embedded in the southeast asian way of life, which are local SEA men. Heck, even SEA men are looking for caucasian/european/white women. Some even sacrifice their home. Since my country was colonized by three western powers consecutively, we see caucasian/european people, in all shape and form, to be superior. The upperclassmen and royals here don't want to mingle with the locals and so they marry europeans. Europeans, they say, are the prettiest. Some old white men even approached me and asked me if I do any "service". Some say they have asian fever. But really, asian fever is just wanting an obedient/submissive woman. But why wouldn't these people approach any traditional european instead, who are more beautiful ? Because the southeast asian women are the easiest when it comes to white men. They called southeast asian women "cheap". I have been depressed ever since. To think that my own women have been considered and treated this way. But I also wish I'm a caucasian/european/white woman. I get to enjoy being prettier than now, with more defined facial structure. I get to be tall, atleast 5'5. And atleast, almost all race fantasize to be with caucasian women. The angelic graceful anglo features are superior in terms of beauty. And the lovely fair skin. I will be accepted more. And since physical attraction initiates the attention in pursuing a love relationship, I won't ever be lonely. And more privileged. I want to be wanted instead of unwanted. I rather. Oh... Oh god please let me wake up to being one.
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