sjackson96 Member Profile

...See more I left an 11 year old abusive relationship and found someone who makes me happy but i constantly stress about losing them. In my original relationship, my ex controlled every part of my life. Where i worked, who i talked to, what games i was allowed to play, made me pay all the bills while they had an almost six figure job. I supported them through college and was too afraid to be alone to do anything until 6 months ago. I talked to alot of people who helped me find my self worth and the courage to leave. I packed what little i could and drove away, living in a hotel. I met my current partner online, it hit off amazingly then i drove two days after up to meet them. We had a wonderful date and they moved into the hotel with me, i hadnt felt this loved in years. They introduced me into Polyamory but only 3 weeks into our relationship. It made me feel inadequate but i tried to push past it to give it a shot since all i knew was monogomy. I worry they do stuff while im at work but tell me theyre not. I used to feel amazing about my self image and the doubts go away when i have a 2nd partner but come back when its just me and my nest partner. I feel like im having to compete for attention and love, theyre constantly on VR flirting with other people which makes me jealous but im allowed to flirt as well which doesnt bother them. Everytime i try and express my feelings on the matter they feel guilty but dont like that i make them feel guilty when they know it hurts my emotions and confidence.

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