sociableTalker4209 Member Profile

...See more First of all, thank you so much for reading my post. English is not my first language so please don't mind for mistakes . I'm married for 20 years. First 10 years of my marriage was fine. we've got 3 beautiful children, who are now 19, 15 and 13. While the kids were so small,my husband went to another country to work. There he met a woman, who he fell in love with. I was living with his mom at the time. My family didn't give me any kind of support, because it's a shame to get divorce. My hometown is a small place where everyone knows everyone. Only advice I get was " he will come back".. He stayed with that woman for 3 years,and after she dumped him,he came back to me and kids. I didn't have anywhere to go,so I took him back. Got panic attacks and depression,ended on antidepresives. Kept living like that, without feelings for him,but I gave him everything he wanted. He found a job in another country again, said that he will find apartment for us,that kids and me can come. But that never happened. He got bone cancer. Operated,and thank God,it was on time,but he can't work that kind of job anymore. Last year I came to that county,to earn more money.left my kids with grandparents. I couldn't live with him because he had roomates. So I stayed with my sister. Started to work, found an apartment for us,to bring my kids.. And I met a man.. fell in love.. got pregnant.. i decided to keep the baby.. I admit to my husband everything. He ended in mental hospital, shizofrenic. My whole family don't accept it. My kids too . I love that man, but I decided to give him a baby right after the birth. I'll stay with my family. It hurts so much. I know that everything is my fault. But it hurts

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