Skip to main content Skip to bottom nav
Feel better with online therapy Professional, confidential and affordable. Start today
sunnyIdea4997
370 M Embraced 3
PathStep 18 Compassion hearts8 Forum posts1 Forum upvotes0 Current upvotes0 Age GroupAdult Last activeMay, 2021 Member sinceMay 4, 2021
Bio
Recent forum posts
sunnyIdea4997 profile picture
I hurt my husband and destroyed our trust. Any advice welcome
Relationship Stress / by sunnyIdea4997
Last post
 May 14th, 2021
...See more My husband and I have been married for 2 and a half years now but we've been best friends for about 6 years. He's seen all my highs and lows, my pervious relationships and all my mistakes. Just a little history about me, i have never been fully faithful in a relationship until i met my husband. and all of that changed and i never wanted to be with anyone except him. We are both military but his job requires him to deploy where as mine does not. He's been deployed a few times, but this last one really challenged me. about a month before he came home, I cheated on him one time and felt so sick after. but then the guy i cheated on him with just gave me all the attention i was not getting from my husband. We had stopped flirting with each other and i just felt like i was not receiving the attention i wanted but this other guy fulfilled that. unfortunately, i never grew up enough to have a conversation about that to my actual husband. i was afraid to say that i needed more from him. He came home one day and saw messages on my phone from the other guy and i just spilled and told him everything. Cheating was the only thing he said he would ever get divorced over, but because he loves me not only because i'm his wife, but his best friend he gave me a chance to prove how sorry i am for this and how i never want to do this again. I feel sick that i betrayed him like that and can't believe i couldn't control myself enough to not cheat and even more upset with myself for not being able to have a simple conversation with my husband about what i needed. I’m trying everything i can to make sure i prove myself to him because i never want him to feel like this and i could never do it again. what i am mainly seeking advice on is why do i keep doing it. i have a history of cheating, whether in a labeled relationship or not, but i just enjoyed the attention so even though the physical affair was over, i kept this other guy around for the emotional affair. Is it that i have a constant need for attention or that i can't let anything good happen? i'm trying to figure myself out so i can make sure this never happens again. help!
Search more from @sunnyIdea4997
Considering Therapy?
Talk to an expert therapist
Badges & Awards
6 total badges
Hand Shake Chief Chat Reconnect First Post Reaching out First Compassion
Report an issue
Considering therapy? Talk to a licensed therapist, wherever you are. Get started
Feel better with online therapy Professional, confidential and affordable. Start today